No Self Respecting Woman Dresses for a Man

Just something that's been bugging me for a time. Something I frequently hear, particularly when discussing women who dress 'immodestly' or behave in a way not typical of societies gender roles, is "you have no self respect" or "she has no self respect" "why doesn't she respect herself?" and so on. But this doesn't make any sense. By saying this, what they're really saying is "I want you to dress in a way which I approve of". It has nothing to do with self respect. To me, self respect is about respecting yourself as a person enough to be comfortable with who you are. You could have that and dress modestly, and have that and dress revealing. It makes no difference.

Why do people say this? I'm genuinely confused. I understand some people have a problem with immodesty (something I'm heavily against, but that's a different debate) but why use this ****ty comeback? At least come up with an argument that's sensible yes?

From my perspective people generally make such comments when someone usually a female dresses in amanner that cries out desperation i.e. by wearing clothes that are too tight for their body shape. People in my experience will also use the terms above when a person has not dressed appropriate for the occasion.

''you're getting way more action than me, and I don't like that''

intent can be read psychically, and if it's a woman's intent to get as much attention as possible, whilst dressing like a hoebag, we can say she lacks self respect since she feels the need for others to validate her existence as a human.

self respect is more about confidence in yourself, not doing things for other people, by which I mean most people act as if the whole of society is watching and judging them, when the only true watcher (and judge) is themselves.

It's about doing things for yourself, for your fulfilment, rather than another person's desire.

(Original post by AppleBell)
From my perspective people generally make such comments when someone usually a female dresses in amanner that cries out desperation i.e. by wearing clothes that are too tight for their body shape. People in my experience will also use the terms above when a person has not dressed appropriate for the occasion.

But there's no such thing as 'not appropriate'. People should be able to dress how they like without someone else getting arsey over it

(Original post by A Cat)
intent can be read psychically, and if it's a woman's intent to get as much attention as possible, whilst dressing like a hoebag, we can say she lacks self respect since she feels the need for others to validate her existence as a human.

self respect is more about confidence in yourself, not doing things for other people, by which I mean most people act as if the whole of society is watching and judging them, when the only true watcher (and judge) is themselves.

It's about doing things for yourself, for your fulfilment, rather than another person's desire.

Maybe she likes dressing like that and isn't doing it for attention? It's a massive assumption to assume someone is dressing in a certain way because they want validation. Most of the time they just like how it looks

its cos they dont respect her and if they dont respect someone then how could they possibly respect themselfs becuase to thoes people everything that they think is right and everyone should think like them , some people cant comprehend how others may have diffrent ideas about things such as how they dress/wear ect...

It's because she can't respect the sanctity of intimacy and parades her body like a w***re.

(Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
Just something that's been bugging me for a time. Something I frequently hear, particularly when discussing women who dress 'immodestly' or behave in a way not typical of societies gender roles, is "you have no self respect" or "she has no self respect" "why doesn't she respect herself?" and so on. But this doesn't make any sense. By saying this, what they're really saying is "I want you to dress in a way which I approve of". It has nothing to do with self respect. To me, self respect is about respecting yourself as a person enough to be comfortable with who you are. You could have that and dress modestly, and have that and dress revealing. It makes no difference.

Why do people say this? I'm genuinely confused. I understand some people have a problem with immodesty (something I'm heavily against, but that's a different debate) but why use this ****ty comeback? At least come up with an argument that's sensible yes?

I've always wondered, if you get killed in Game of Thrones, will your TSR account be deactivated?

Ie a hoe has no self respect, they will sell their body for sex just for money, whereas another girl would revise hard get good grades and get a respectable job.

Now don't even go arguing with me saying being a ****ing hoe is a respectable job, because if you are, then you obviously haven't been living with society and see the bad rep that sluts and hoes get, so I wont even bother replying.

I'm just answering your question.

(Original post by scapepower)
It's because she can't respect the sanctity of intimacy and parades her body like a w***re.

What sanctity of intimacy? A body is nothing bad or that should be hidden

(Original post by rcummins1)
I've always wondered, if you get killed in Game of Thrones, will your TSR account be deactivated?

I hope that day never comes, I like living

It goes along the lines of if you flaunt your body to anyone to ogle at you obviously don't value the intimacy of your body or you are so lacking in self respect you sacrifice your modesty for attention.

So if you 'Get your tits out for the lads' you either place no value in the privacy and intimacy of your breasts or you lack the self respect to control yourself at resist the urge to sacrifice you modesty for the immediate rewards of the attention and titilation (lol) of the act. Self respect is the chief element of self control.

People will always judge you for how you act. It's part of life.

However it's your body. Do what you like.

(Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
Just something that's been bugging me for a time. Something I frequently hear, particularly when discussing women who dress 'immodestly' or behave in a way not typical of societies gender roles, is "you have no self respect" or "she has no self respect" "why doesn't she respect herself?" and so on. But this doesn't make any sense. By saying this, what they're really saying is "I want you to dress in a way which I approve of". It has nothing to do with self respect. To me, self respect is about respecting yourself as a person enough to be comfortable with who you are. You could have that and dress modestly, and have that and dress revealing. It makes no difference.

Why do people say this? I'm genuinely confused. I understand some people have a problem with immodesty (something I'm heavily against, but that's a different debate) but why use this ****ty comeback? At least come up with an argument that's sensible yes?

(Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
But there's no such thing as 'not appropriate'. People should be able to dress how they like without someone else getting arsey over it

No, there is such a thing as "not appropriate".

I hate it when people wear skirts barely past their butt cheeks, no/super thin tights, and they're walking ahead of me on the staircase.

Neither is it appropriate to wear a full gown on your way to lectures.

Neither is it appropriate to be wearing booty shorts and a tank top in cold, rainy weather.

Neither is it appropriate to wear a short, tight vest top when you're just fat.

I could go on.

(Original post by Another)
No, there is such a thing as "not appropriate".

I hate it when people wear skirts barely past their butt cheeks, no/super thin tights, and they're walking ahead of me on the staircase.

Neither is it appropriate to wear a full gown on your way to lectures.

Neither is it appropriate to be wearing booty shorts and a tank top in cold, rainy weather.

Neither is it appropriate to wear a short, tight vest top when you're just fat.

I could go on.

It's perfectly appropriate to wear those things. If you don't like it, don't wear it. But don't try and tell others not to. People can wear what they feel comfortable in, providing their outfit isn't rude and insulting, which none of them are

(Original post by Jacob :))
It goes along the lines of if you flaunt your body to anyone to ogle at you obviously don't value the intimacy of your body or you are so lacking in self respect you sacrifice your modesty for attention.

So if you 'Get your tits out for the lads' you either place no value in the privacy and intimacy of your breasts or you lack the self respect to control yourself at resist the urge to sacrifice you modesty for the immediate rewards of the attention and titilation (lol) of the act. Self respect is the chief element of self control.

People will always judge you for how you act. It's part of life.

However it's your body. Do what you like.

Thanks for a well informed answer. Personally I view it a bit differently, I just don't see what all the fuss is about with a body. It's just a body. But I s'pose that comes under not valuing privacy.

I agree, I never really understood that expression either. If that person chooses to dress like that, so be it, it's not like she thought "Ooh, what should I do today? I know, a bit of self disrespecting is on the menu! Now, where did I put that slutty top and skirt....?"

(Original post by Tyrion_Lannister)
Thanks for a well informed answer. Personally I view it a bit differently, I just don't see what all the fuss is about with a body. It's just a body. But I s'pose that comes under not valuing privacy.

Your welcome. Remember that even if you don't think it's a big deal to see your boobs boys will consider it a big deal. They'll consider it an achievement and a triumph. "Yeh I saw her tits!" So they will see you as easy and not a challenge so they'll lose respect for you.

(Original post by Jacob :))
Your welcome. Remember that even if you don't think it's a big deal to see your boobs boys will consider it a big deal. They'll consider it an achievement and a triumph. "Yeh I saw her tits!" So they will see you as easy and not a challenge so they'll lose respect for you.

I don't 'flash my boobs', I just wear what I like and sometimes that has cleavage on display. I really don't care what boys think, I think if someone's silly enough to value someone in whether or not they're 'pure' or 'modest' then they're not really someone I want to associate with. I have a partner of over a year who respects me regardless of dress

When I see girls in clubs wearing those skimpy knicker shorts and crop tops I do sometimes think to myself, how little self respect they have for themselves. Because they know what they are doing, they want to get attention through showing ridiculous amounts of flesh, probably for an ego-boost. Now I know we all dress up and like to look nice, but it's as if they are inviting people to look at them as if they are a piece of meat. And if you respected yourself, would you want that?

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Source: https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=2374380

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